It’s Not Taboo – It’s Essential: End-of-Life Planning

By Maribeth Kearney On Nov 18, 2025

While discussing end-of-life decisions may feel uncomfortable, planning can reduce stress for both you and your loved ones, ensuring that your wishes are honored. End-of-life decision-making is about values, not just medical choices. It is essential to clarify what quality of life means to an individual, which will help to guide all other decisions. 

Here are some tips on end-of-life planning and decision-making. 

Start the conversation early. Do not wait until a health crisis. Talk to your family, loved ones, and healthcare clinicians about your values, beliefs, and preferences. These conversations are often easier – and more productive – when you are feeling well. It also helps to alleviate guilt and the decision-making burden on your family. 

Put your wishes in writing. Plan your estate with advance directives, wills, power of attorney, and healthcare proxies. Work with a clinician to complete physician orders for life-sustaining treatment (POLST) and do not resuscitate (DNR) orders. These documents give clear instructions about the medical care you do or do not want, along with other wishes. Presenting your wishes clearly in these documents will prevent confusion, reduce stress, avoid conflict, and ensure your decisions are respected. 

Focus on quality of life. Think about what matters to you most. Would you want continued treatment or comfort-focused care at a certain point? Would you want to be at home? How would you want your pain managed? Defining what your quality of life means to you can help guide decisions when difficult choices arise. 

Learn about your care options. Palliative care and hospice are often misunderstood. Palliative care can be introduced at any stage of a serious illness, not just the end of life. Hospice is best considered when the focus shifts from cure to comfort. However, hospice isn’t about giving up. It is about prioritizing comfort, dignity, and support for yourself and your loved ones. Hospice is offered to those who have six months or less, to allow for all services – such as art and music therapy – to be utilized, not just in the final days. Ask questions and explore the different services that are available to you. 

Revisit your decisions over time. Your feelings may change as your health and circumstances evolve. Regularly review your plan and update it if needed. 

Seek support. End-of-life planning can be overwhelming. Seeks support from loved ones. Also, encourage family members to ask questions, seek counseling, and attend support groups.

About the Author: Maribeth Kearney is the director of Valley Hospice. For more information about Valley Hospice, please visit ValleyHealth.com/Hospice or call 201-291-6131 to request services. 

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